Two days before Mother’s Day, Cassondra Wilson’s three children were probably like many others — thinking of ways to honor their mother on her special day.
Unbeknownst to Jaden, Cam and Sydney Wilson, this year’s Mother’s Day weekend ended up being the toughest time of their lives.
On the evening of May 8, Cassondra M. Wilson, died at the age of 45. The autopsy later revealed the cause of death as a homicide.
Her funeral service was May 15 at St. Peter’s Lutheran Church in Columbus.
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The news sent shockwaves throughout the Wilson family and the entire community.
Cam Wilson said he has a very independent personality and doesn’t like to rely on people too much, especially emotionally. He soon realized he couldn’t handle it alone, as he had trouble sleeping some nights, and it was hard to be alone at times.
“When something like this happens, it’s taught me that you can’t always handle things alone,” Cam said. “Without the people that reached out to me, my brother, my sister and my whole immediate family, it would have been tough. It would have been really, really tough. Getting over this would have been a lot more difficult.”
It’s tough on anybody later on in their natural lives when they have to deal with the passing of their mother. It is even tougher when that passing comes unexpectedly, and at such a young age, while the son or daughter is turning the page to the next chapter of his or her own life.
Jaden, who turned 25 Saturday, is a 2013 graduate of Columbus North. Cam, 21, is a 2017 graduate of Columbus East. Sydney, 18, recently graduated from East.
Jaden played football for the Bull Dogs, Cam ran track and played football for the Olympians and Sydney ran track for East.
There has been an outpouring of support for Cam and the rest of his family from the Indiana University football team, where Cam played as a redshirt sophomore last fall. Several coaches, including head coach Tom Allen, reached out to Cam, checking in on him with phone calls and making visits to his house.
One of the core values that Allen preaches to his players on a consistent basis is the power of LEO, which means to “love each other.”
That message came in full display over the past few weeks with all of Cam’s teammates and the coaching staff showing their love and support for Cam and his entire family during his time of need. They have all reached out to Cam and have given him their condolences and also donated to a GoFundMe page that Jaden Wilson started in Cassondra’s honor. They have also been bringing over food and sitting down and talking to the family.
“It’s almost like an extended family at IU. The amount of people reaching out and doing everything they can to help, it’s great, especially the coach and inviting them all at the funeral service, and they came to my funeral service, which was beautiful, by the way,” Cam said. “That support is so impactful, and the donations, and with my sister going to IU next year, with them being in contact with the people they know. To go out of their way to do something like that, it really means a lot to me.”
Allen made the trip to Columbus on May 15 to be there for Cam during the funeral proceedings.
When the team began its virtual awards ceremony for the 2019 season on May 14, Allen started the ceremony with a moment of silence for Cam and the entire Wilson family.
“It’s just trying to be a consistent source of emotional support, mental support and spiritual support in just any way possible,” Allen said. “We’re being in constant communication with him over the phone, and I know a lot of players that reached out in numerous numbers, and it’s just encouraging. It’s just one of those situations that’s beyond what most people ever have to deal with.”
One player on the IU football team that has known Cam the longest is offensive lineman Harry Crider. The duo made plenty of memories during their time together playing for the Olympians.
Crider said he first met Cam around the fifth or sixth grade on a travel football program through PAAL called the Columbus Diesel. That time kickstarted a great friendship between the two. Crider and Cam shared much success together on the football field together at East, including a Class 5A state runner-up finish in 2016.
“It was devastating, for sure,” Crider said. “I think the shock that went through Columbus … it really shows just how much love there was for the Wilson family and how we cherished all the Wilson kids and their mom, especially. It was crazy news, but they’re fighters. All those kids are fighters, and we love them.”
Crider said he and the rest of the IU football team has reached out to Cam through several text messages, and he also added that Cam seemed to be doing all right.
Following their high school football careers at East, the two briefly went separate ways with Crider going to IU while Cam began his college journey at Illinois State until he made the decision to transfer and become a walk-on at Indiana. The two were reunited again, this time as college teammates.
“We spent a lot of time together through sports and off the field,” Crider said. “We had gotten a lot closer once he came to IU. It really brought us together, and it’s great to have him at IU.”
East football coach Bob Gaddis said one of the best words that would describe Cam is “competitive.”
“Cam was a very competitive player for us,” Gaddis said. “He worked hard and was a very good teammate. By the time he was a senior, in the tournament, he played a little bit of offense and defense, which is unusual for our program. Everyone knew Cam was a great receiver and a really deep threat for us. He also played defensive back and special teams. He was just willing to do whatever the team wanted him to do.”
Allen said the best ways to describe Cam would be “high energy,” “a great personality” and “someone that always smiles.” Allen took the time to chat with the Wilson family whenever they came to the football games and saw the strong relationship and bonds the family shared.
“What makes this so hard to handle was just the closeness he had to (Cassondra) and how much we knew that she meant to him,” Allen said. “To see that taken away is really hard. He’s got a huge heart, a big heart for people, and it shows every time that you are with him, so our players love being around him.”
Cam also said he enjoyed seeing the support from his alma mater and also from Parkside Elementary, where he went to school as a kid. He said they have pitched in and brought food and also donated to the GoFundMe page.
The amount of outreach, Cam says, has been amazing.
“All those things mean a lot to my family. The community has done a great job as well as other students, which has really surprised me,” Cam said. “A lot of high school kids are reaching out and donating. The community response from Columbus East as a whole, it was fantastic to say the least, and it helped a lot because you don’t do those kinds of things alone.”
Sydney Wilson was ready to begin her senior season of track earlier this year and was excited for her upcoming graduation, but on April 2, track and all other spring sports were canceled due to the COVID-19 pandemic. Bartholomew Consolidated School Corp. later decided to have a virtual graduation commencement ceremony.
On May 9, East principal Mark Newell said the school notified Sydney Wilson’s teachers, along with the rest of the faculty and staff, about her mother’s passing.
“(Sydney) always had a smile on her face. I always enjoyed talking to her in the hallway,” Newell said. “I know she was excited about track season coming up. She’s a great kid.”
East is providing counseling to any student who needs it. In the past, counseling would have been done face-to-face. However, with COVID-19 preventing face-to-face meetings, Newell said counseling is provided for the students through such applications as Zoom or Google Meet.
“It certainly complicates things, but we make sure we are taking care of the kids,” Newell said. “The teachers are on the lookout for any students who need the extra support, and they get to work with the counselors and the counselors reach out to those students and their families.”
Sydney’s track coach, Glen Brown, reached out to the team and started to collect cards and notes the week following the tragedy. Brown also said many of the athletes on his team were hurting pretty badly upon hearing the news about their senior teammate.
“Her character is super fantastic. She’s very much upbeat and open and willing to help and working hard. She would have been a four-year starter in the spring for us,” Brown said. “I’ve not spoken directly to Sydney, but I have reached out to the family and the family friends that are in contact with her. I left it that she could contact me when she was ready. I’ve reached out to the team and left them the same message that I left her.”
Sydney will be joining Cam at IU next year and plans to major in pre-med.
Jaden Wilson set up the GoFundMe page in Cassondra’s memory to help raise money to defray funeral costs and to support the children. Their goal was $50,000, but by midnight Saturday, more than $84,000 had been raised through donations from 878 people — including several of Cam’s former East and current IU teammates and even retiring IU athletic director Fred Glass. A donation of $30,000 came from Deborah Bickerstaff, a California philanthropist.
“It’s been great to see all the guys on the team use our platform on social media to spread awareness and I know that GoFundMe that was going around really got some traction,” Crider said. “It was awesome to see our guys spreading that around.”
Those who would like to make a donation to the Wilson family still can donate at https://www.gofundme.com/f/cassondra-wilson039s-memorial-fund.
“It’s a horrible situation,” Allen said. “We just have to be there for (Cam). Sometimes, there’s not much you can say in these kind of things, but right now, it’s about helping him in every way we can.”
The huge support pouring in the community left Cam realizing how much of an influence his mother was in her children’s lives, and the impact that Cassondra made in the community.
“Although it was a tragedy, my mom left a legacy, and I think a lot of people will benefit from hearing our story. It’s good for people to hear this because you got to cherish the people you love, tell them that you love them everyday, you just never know when they will be gone. I had to learn that the hard way,” Cam Wilson said. “I told my mom I loved her, but I know a lot of people don’t get that opportunity and there’s a lot of things you wish you could say before someone leaves, so just cherish the relationships.”
