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Letter: Women not alone in healing process

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From: Sage Isaacs

North Vernon

According to research by Obstetrics & Gynecology LWW Journal published in 2011, 30 percent of American women will have an abortion by age 45. Many women tend to think they are the only one hurting from abortion, as if no one else could understand how she feels. Silently these women suffer, but they don’t have to. If these words resonate with you, you are not alone.

“The sound of a vacuum, fluorescent lights, the smell of a doctor’s office or the cry of a baby — those are some of the triggers that remind me of that traumatic day.” These are the words of women in my support group who years earlier experienced an abortion. The clinic told us it would be a “quick fix,” and our lives would return to normal.

For most post-abortive women and men, life changes. Guilt, shame and regret crowd out joy and peace. Coping with the secret of taking a life affects relationships, as we keep people at a distance to avoid judgment. Memories, nightmares or hallucinations cause anxiety or give us reason to seek comfort in addictions.

Post-traumatic stress is real. A life was taken, and our human nature is in conflict with the reality of our involvement. A mother’s nurturing instincts and a father’s protective internal nature are violated.

To cope with pain many build a wall around his or her heart. Anger sometimes takes grip and often turns into rage and bitterness. Many women develop problems with future children: overprotecting or failing to bond. Many men develop a sense of powerlessness, depression, or fear of failing financially, socially or relationally.

There are choices to be made: staying stuck in stress or the choice to heal. There is hope and freedom for the brokenhearted. There are women and men who have walked in your shoes yet chosen a path to heal. Because of their changed lives, they reach out to help others. Abortion healing is available, free and completely confidential.

Hearts Restored: Healing After Abortion provides a support study that leads you through the pain, grief, shame, loss and anger to experience the freedom of feeling forgiven and set free. Finally surrendering your secret with safe people will lighten the burden of carrying this painful loss.

Moving on from the entanglement of past decisions is possible. Past choices do not need to be the end of your story. There is hope for a new beginning. I know. I have participated in a support group study, and I’m free from uncontrollable anger. This helped to heal my marriage; I am a better wife, mother and a happier person. God has forgiven me, and I have a new purpose to speak love and healing into the lives of other hurting women.

Hearts Restored serves Bartholomew, Brown, Decatur, Jackson, Jennings and Shelby counties. From teens to 90-year-olds, someone you know needs healing. To talk one-on-one with someone who understands and cares, or inquire about a small group study, call Sue at 812-567-3150 or Don at 812-720-0802.

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