Dear Amy: My son recently received his learner’s permit to drive.The other day, backing out of a driveway, he hit our neighbor’s mailbox. My husband was with him and admittedly was not paying attention at that moment.
The owner was nice about it and they agreed to have my son and husband replace it. My husband thought my son should pay for the replacement of the mailbox. We ended up in an argument over this last part.
I feel that my husband was supposed to be paying attention. I have warned him repeatedly that our son needs a lot more practice. My husband feels that I am being soft.
It could have been avoided if my husband hadn’t been looking at his phone at the time. My husband has accepted that what he did was wrong, but is angry at me for letting our son “off the hook.”
Our son apologized and worked in 90-degree temperatures to replace the mailbox. Am I letting my son off the hook?
— Responsible Mom
Dear Mom: Your husband seems to be taking a (laudable) stand to try to teach your son responsibility and accountability, but the easiest — and most effective — way for him to do this would be for him to say: “Son, lesson number one in our safe-driving course is this: DON’T look at your phone while you are in charge of the vehicle.
This is the very essence of a teachable moment, and your husband blew it by blaming the student for the teacher’s failure.
