From: Michael Meyer
Hope
The letter by Colby Cochran in praise of coyotes had a couple of comments that intrigued me. First, that coyotes were smart; second, the reproduction rate; and third, that they can be managed naturally.
I remember Saturday mornings when I watched Wile E. Coyote develop methods to catch the Road Runner. I must admit I was always rooting for him. I agree coyotes are smart.
The comment that they could survive a kill rate of 500,000, or 70 percent of the population, and maintain the population levels piqued my interest. What happens if they were allowed to freely reproduce. Being semi-retired with few means of amusement besides pointing out the factual errors on my friends’ emails, I decided to do some calculating.
Without boring you with details, I put together a spreadsheet that considered birth rates, fertility ranges and death rates.
The results: By year 3, population expands to 8.6 million. Years 4-8 show increases to an alarming 240 million. By year 9, everyone has a coyote. At year 11 we are up to our ears in coyotes at 1.8 billion.
What will they eat? The normal food will likely be depleted by years 6 -7. Less food means the coyotes will start hunting in the daylight. I wouldn’t mind if they took a bite out of the goose population; I have geese issues, but others may disagree.
What about Fluffy and Fido? Keep them in at night? I don’t know about you, but whenever Fido has to go, he is doing his business outside, night or day, doesn’t matter. He will have to hold it or face the coyotes, his choice. Fluffy, on the other hand, has a litter box.
After those food sources are depleted what else is available? One growing source of protein during the next 10 years: Baby Boomers! They are slow, have diminished sight, are hearing impaired — advantage to the coyote. Imagine Boomers on mobility scooters chased by packs of bloodthirsty coyotes. Not a pretty thought.
The writer indicated that the population will stabilize like Yellowstone. Well, here is the inconvenient truth. Wolves. Yep, introduced wolves equals coyote population stabilized. So, reintroduce wolves. Well, they will eat deer, cows, pigs and Boomers. Farmers will be forced to congregate all the livestock into central locations — yes, more CAFOs.
Aside from a reduction in the goose population, I must conclude that I see no benefit to unhindered reproduction.
As I wrote this letter I wondered, where does Wile E. get the money for parts? Is he supported by a foreign government to catch and kill the Road Runner? Is he a mad genius or a terrorist? Where is this ACME company that makes and sells these products? Why does the post office deliver packages and explosives to his door within minutes?
I have to ponder this for a while. If I do it right, it will likely take me to after the elections, when I will have a whole new batch of email corrections to make.
