Dating app connection kills romance

Dear Amy: Three months ago, I met a girl through a dating app.

The first night we met, she said she was moving to LA in a month and wanted a guy she could sleep with in the meantime. I obliged.

After a few weeks of being together, she starting telling me that she loved me.

After a month together, she pushed back her move date to stay with me longer. I started to develop strong feelings for her and I began to fall in love with her.

During this time, she had to go out to LA for work a couple of times. I did not know at the time that she had an ex she’d been with for about five or six years who was living in LA. When she went out there, she saw him.

She came back from one of her trips and I confronted her about it. She said if she was engaged to me she would have a reason to stay here.

She said she felt obligated to see her ex because he had been there for her during a difficult time in her life.

Last month, she moved out to LA, and in with him.

We still talk daily. She says she loves me and wants to be my wife.

I do not know what to do.

— Unsure

Dear Unsure: Well, romance is officially dead. And you two killed it.

This guy in LA is not her “ex.” He is her current. And you might be the guy she uses to manipulate her LA guy.

And take precautions (and be tested) for STDs.

Dear Amy: I want my boyfriend to prepare for an exam so he can get a stable and good-paying job, but he doesn’t want to prepare for any exam, and instead he took a low-paying job.

I don’t see it as a good decision and we are continuously fighting.

Having a good job with a decent salary is important for me, otherwise my family won’t allow me to marry him.

What should I do?

— Disappointed

Dear Disappointed: If having a good job with a decent salary is important to you, then you should pursue this worthy goal for yourself. Your boyfriend may never get there.

Your boyfriend is not ready to adopt your values. He may never be ready to adopt your values.

The magic of adulthood happens when you finally become the person you most want to be with.

You should try it.

Dear Amy: Thank you a thousand times for running the letter from “Lonely and Alone,” who wrote about the painful experience of having a spouse with a mental illness or brain disorder. I truly saw myself in his letter, and I saw that I need and deserve help, too.

— Grateful

Dear Grateful: I thought this was a brave account outlining the stigma surrounding mental illness, and the impact on family members. Anyone in a similar position should contact NAMI.org and look into the NAMI family-to-family program.