Dear Amy: We are at loss as how to deal with our 17-year-old son.
He has always pushed the boundaries. Teachers have long identified him as bright but unmotivated. But recently his behavior has gotten much worse.
He frequently argues with us, refuses to help at home, and needs multiple prompts to get to school or work. He is failing all of his classes.
He is smoking marijuana at home. We have tried mightily to stop this. Recently, after getting upset, he started breaking things.
I feel like his recent behavior is because he doesn’t have a goal for his life.
We talk to him about options: getting a GED, taking classes at the community college, or just working full-time.
When he won’t go to therapy, his father and I go instead.
Nothing seems to work. He seems miserable, and we are too.
Where do we go from here?
— Parents in Despair
Dear Parents:
Your son has pot in his system 24 hours a day. He may have started using to mitigate other problems such as anxiety or depression. But now his drug use is the primary problem.
You should try to communicate with him about a workable plan for when he turns 18. You should let him know that you will never give up on him, but that you won’t be housing him as long as he is using.
