Dear Amy: My partner and I are two middle-age men that met each other later in life.
One of us (me) loves air conditioning, especially since most of the places I’ve lived in my life lacked it. My partner doesn’t like air conditioning, and only uses it when it’s blistering hot outside.
When I moved into his house, I paid for the installation of central air conditioning. He paid for the solar panels on the roof, which more than covers the electricity we use.
But we seem to fight constantly over the thermostat setting. He’s cold when I set it to my preferred temperature, I’m hot when he sets it to his.
I say it’s easier for him to throw on a flannel shirt and a pair of sweatpants than it is for me to suffer the indignity of walking around the house in my underwear.
Can you think of an equitable way to solve this problem?
— Sweating in San Diego
Dear Sweating:
I maintain that many people are influenced by the number they see on the thermostat. A way to test this would be for you and your partner to trade off setting the thermostat “blind,” where one of you can’t see the number on the thermostat. You might find a sweet spot where you are both basically comfortable.
But let’s just stipulate that you and he have radically different body temperature needs. Ideally, you should shoot for him wearing a long-sleeve T-shirt and trousers and you a short-sleeve T-shirt and shorts.
Otherwise, yes, I agree with you (and my sister) that it is easier to warm up with extra clothing than to cool down by shedding it.
Dear Amy: I’m invited to my niece’s wedding in Arizona this August.
I am fully vaccinated, but the wedding will be indoors and the guests will be maskless.
I don’t have any idea how many other people will be fully vaccinated, but I would guess maybe 50 percent? I know it won’t be 100 percent.
I don’t want to go and be the only person wearing a mask. I’d like to go, but it doesn’t really seem safe to me. What do you think?
– Conflicted
Dear Conflicted: This sort of dilemma has become an almost universal experience, as we all emerge from what we hope is the beginning of the end of the pandemic in North America.
Each individual will have to make their own risk assessment concerning choosing to attend crowded events alongside unmasked and unvaccinated people.
In my opinion, this particular event presents a higher risk than you might be comfortable assuming.
A wedding in Arizona in August is guaranteed to be held indoors, in a closed venue with air conditioning and possibly fans circulating cooled air.
(According to the Accuweather.com forecast for Phoenix this August, the average daytime high temperatures during the month will be 102 degrees.)
Given the fact that the Coronavirus spreads through air droplets, which would circulate within a closed environment such as a wedding venue, this could lead to the sort of spreading event that would present a potentially extremely serious risk to unvaccinated guests.
You are vaccinated against the disease caused by this virus, and your vaccination would protect you against serious symptoms, but given the assumptions I’m making and your own concerns, you might want to give this a pass.
Dear Amy: “Unfashionable and Unhappy” described the pressure her friends put on her to spiff up and wear makeup.
Boy, could I relate! I’ve never been into clothes, and my house isn’t perfect, either.
My friends know to take it or leave it.
– Been There
Dear Been There: I described these friends as, “lovely little bullies.”
“Unfashionable” needs to stand her ground.
