Dear Amy: We have had a 13-year-old staying with us for four months.
She came home with our daughter and asked if she could stay for a week, and we were very happy that she stayed on.
Now her 23-year-old sister wants to have her leave our home and live with her and her boyfriend.
The problem is they can’t seem to make ends meet.
I have seen this child grow and change and really come out of her shell since she has lived with us.
She brings a lot of joy to our home.
I feel like her leaving would break a part of me that is already wounded.
I told the girl that we are in her corner either way. And she says she enjoys the stability of our home.
What should I do?
— Devastated Mom
Dear Mom: Families like yours who take in and take care of unrelated children form an informal network of compassion and caring. Scores of adults report that they wouldn’t have survived their teen years without their neighbors, or their friends’ parents, providing shelter, affection, encouragement and support.
You don’t mention this girl’s parents or provide details about her family situation, but if she is living with you without her parents’ permission, you could be in some legal jeopardy for harboring her. That’s a worst-case scenario regarding your own risks.
