Dear Amy: I have had a woman in my life who has been like a mother to me since childhood. When I had each of my three children, she came out to help me. She has been like a grandmother to my kids for their entire lives.
This past summer I visited her with two of my children. She had two second cousins visiting, also. I thought the visit went well.
However, a week or so after we returned home, she wouldn’t respond to any calls or texts.
I was super confused, but found out later, via an email that had passed around to various members of her family, that her family had accused me of coming on to the two male cousins while I was there.
In the email, she stated that although she never witnessed this, she was hurt that I would do this to her family.
She has not only cut off all communication with me, but she won’t talk to my children. They don’t understand why their “grandma” wants nothing to do with them.
What do I tell them, and how do we move forward?
— Wondering
Dear Wondering:
Write to her. Deny all accusations. Do not accuse her family members of jealousy — you don’t want to back her into a corner.
Affirm your affection and warm feelings. Remind her of your long and loving history. Tell her that the kids love and miss her, and tell her that you hope she will see it in her heart to stay in all of your lives.
